It’s October and St. Michael’s always puts on a Pre-Cana to help couples get
ready for living their marriage. Topics such as communication, finance,
in-laws and faith are covered in the day. Much time is spent putting on
a festive event. During our Pre-Cana time, we try to look at putting on a
I love weddings. I have done over 900 weddings and love every one of them.
It is nice to share in the excitement, joy, fear and commitment of the couples and their guests. It is often at these heartfelt times, in the
depth humanity, God is found. I love weddings.
Some of my best priest stories happen around weddings. With over 900
weddings that I have witnessed as a priest, there have been some very human and very Godly times. Here are a couple of stories.
I had a wedding when the 17 year locust epidemic was in full bloom in
Virginia. As the bride made her way to the church, the locusts were
attracted by a white moving object. By the time she got in church, the
dress was a moving living brown outfit.
With 5 minutes before the ceremony, bride remembered to pick up her mom at the hotel which was 45 minutes away from the church.
I got to marry a couple in the hospital two days before the groom went to
his eternal reward.
I got to be the DJ at the reception when the hired help became intoxicated.
(There was a lot of “Brick House” (my favorite dance tune) being played that night.
I especially like to talk to couples in my office to hear their stories
first-hand. My job is to talk them out of getting married. If I can talk
them out of getting married they were probably not too ready in the first
place. (There is a movie starring Robin Williams which has the same story
line.) If a couple passes my interviews, I’m ready to celebrate their vows
We have a good time in the office and the questions are fun. The youngest couple to come in to get married was 14. The oldest person I married was 92. Marriage is a lifetime in which a couple picks each other to share in the fullness of life, to share in finding the Lord. They celebrate that God has called them to share in the fullness of life as a couple.
I have lots of weddings coming up including three family weddings. The best to all of you. The best to our Pre-Cana weekend.
What advice can you give our Pre-Cana couples this weekend?
What to wear, what to wear? Things sure were more simple years ago when we had three options: school clothes, work clothes and, what we in the Hoying family called, “Sunday, go to meeting clothes”, the best outfit in the closet.
What to wear in New Zealand was easier also as nearly every school had uniforms. From Monday through Friday the same outfit was worn. But now, it’s the weekend and what do you wear to church? There’s always something to do right after church, like a ballgame, a neighborhood gathering, a movie or other social events. And if you are like me, you hate to keep changing clothes. And it’s Summer. How much clothes do I have to wear to be considered dignified for church?
What to wear, what to wear? Even in workplaces, fashion has changed. Wearing of a tie and business suit is rare. What is the proper fashion for a church setting? When considering an outfit I always try to consider that going to church is a community gathering to give praise to God.
If my outfit distracts from the worship, I’m probably wearing the wrong clothes. If I were to wear a skirt to church in Fiji or Samoa it would not distract from worship. If I wore a skirt here, all the women would be jealous of my legs, and the prayer would be distracted (ha ha). Sometimes clothing or lack of clothing needs to be considered when determining what to wear to church. God will hear my prayers no matter what I wear, but if my outfit prevents others from praying, I’m probably not looking out for my neighbor as well as I should.