Catholic Community Commentary

To Hell and Back

There have been a number of people make comments on the first blog regarding after-life and what I experienced nearly 45 years ago when I got shot at the age of 8.  There are parts of that near death experience that I will never forget. 
Through the years, I have spoken with a number of people who have shared their near death experiences.  There are a number of things we have in common in our “visions” of the next life.  Nearly everyone I have spoken with have shared the presence of an amazing light, the feeling of complete peace and the feeling of not wanting to come back. 
These aspects are common, but the second part of my near death experience is not necessarily common.  I have only found a couple of people who have shared with me the second part of their and my near death experience.  We got to experience a vision of what hell would be.
I remember after I experienced such amazing peace and light with a heavenly gathering, I found myself completely alone in such a darkness, where shadows lived and so did pursuant beings.  I knew I would never experience what was once so near and so right.  To be pursued by darkness and nothingness was completely scary.  (If you have ever seen the movie “Ghost” with Patrick Swayzee you may have some idea of the darkness which pursued me.) 
I remember the fear, which I have never experienced since, that filled me.  I remember the aloneness.  I remember knowing that I would never be able to leave that place.  My memories of hell were of darkness, loneliness, being pursued by evil and pure fear.  I’ve experienced a lot of fear in my lifetime but nothing like that portion of the near death experience.  
There are questions that I have asked myself after I came back.  Why did I go there in the first place?    Why did I go there after I went to the heavenly place first?  What I tell people is that if heaven is like I experienced it, heaven is the place you want to be, and I don’t tell them about the dark vision. 
For me, I am not driven by a fear of the darkness.  I am so influenced by the light of the Lord that there is little room for darkness.  To be in the presence of the Lord is heaven.  I see glimpses of that light in my ministry, through people and nature. 
I believe in the reality of hell, that people have the capacity to choose to be away from God’s love and other’s love.  I believe hell is living a life without God.  To be pursued with something other than light and never know fulfillment or peace scares me.  To never give love or take love in is hell and darkness.  As opposed to my heavenly vision where there were lots of people, I saw no one in hell.  
 
So get used to going to the light.  It is where we all want to be, forever.
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